Funky Cold Medina

Alright

dig it

Cold coolin' at a bar

and I'm lookin' for some action

But like Mick Jagger said

I can't get no satisfaction

The girls are all around

but none of them wanna get with me

My threads are fresh and I'm lookin' def'

yo

what's up with L-O-C?

The girls is all jockin' at the other end of the bar

Havin' drinks with some no name chump when they know that I'm the star

So I got up and strolled over to the other side of the cantina

I asked the guy

“Why you so fly?” he said

“Funky Cold Medina”

Funky Cold Medina

This brother told me a secret on how to get more chicks

Put a little Medina in your glass

and the girls'll come real quick

It's better than any alcohol or aphrodisiac

A couple of sips of this love potion

and she'll be on your lap

So I gave some to my dog when he began to beg

Then he licked his bowl and he looked at me and did the wild thing on my leg

He used to scratch and bite me

before he was much

much meaner

But now all the poodles run to my house for the Funky Cold Medina

You know I'm sayin'?

I got every dog in my neighborhood breaking down my door

...

The won't leave my dog alone with that Medina

pal

I went up to this girl

she said

“Hi

my name is Sheena”

I thought she'd be good to go with a little Funky Cold Medina

She said

“I'd like a drink”

I said

“Ehm

okay

I'll go get it”

Then a couple sips she cold licked her lips and I knew that she was with it

So I took her to my crib

and everything went well as planned

But when she got undressed

it was a big old mess

Sheena was a man

So I threw him out

I don't fool around with no Oscar Meyer wiener

You must be sure that your girl is pure for the Funky Cold Medina

Do you know?

Ain't no plans with a man

This is the 80s and I'm down with the ladies

you know

Break it down

Back in the saddle

lookin' for a little affection

I took a shot as a contestant on

the Love Connection

The audience voted

and you know

they picked a winner

I took my date to the Hilton for a Medina and some dinner

We had a few drinks

I'm thinkin' soon what I'll be gettin'

Instead she started talkin' 'bout plans for our weddin'

I said

“Wait

slow down

love

not so fast says

I'll be seein' ya”

That's why I found you don't play around with the Funky Cold Medina

You know I'm sayin'?

That Medina is a monster yo

Funky Cold Medina