anticoagulant

i start to move forward i'm doing well but

that scab screams my name

so i scratch it to hear what it's saying

to hear what it's saying

replay

every scene

organs freeze

all of my vitals dim in and out

desperate to breathe

i have seen months of progression

all wither out

they wither out

so i search agressively in hopes to find the part of me that i used to love

i used to know

but i'm gone

and it's bleeding out

everywhere that i go there's a constant reminder

a place

a feeling i can't get around

once i start

i can't stop

and the foliage falls at my feet

in the form of a memory lost

i trip and fall

maybe i'm subconsciously a masochist who loves to ff my own mind

i wear it out

aware of doubt

i still search desparately in hopes to find the part of me that you seem to have

it's gone and i'm bleeding out

everywhere that i go

there's a constant reminder

a place

a feeling i can't get around

once i start

i can't stop

and the foliage falls at my feet

in the form of a memory

black and white is how i see

never inbetween

a dozen weeks of progress

wither out

they wither out

searching in and out of me

planning surgery

i tear apart my ribcage

just to double check

but still you've got it

you've got it

tumor

growing

tumor

growing