diary of a simp

wet fart

paul blart

got my dick stuck in a shopping cart

took a shart in k-mart

then my god damn car wouldn't start

went to school 'cause i'm cool

i get all a's

jocks aren't tools

i don't play sports

i'm not a fool

i always wear floaties in the swimming pool

safety first

brought worse

when i'm alone

i like to wear skirts

i hate bullies

they're the worst

they make fun of my fortnite shirt

mommy makes me mash my m&m's because she mash my bananas because i'm her special little and she doesn't want me to die

she'll be sad and i don't wanna make her sad

bed time is 8 o'clock

no exceptions

i donate all my money to my favorite e-girl

it's my favorite thing in the whole wide world

she says she loves me when i pay her bills

and watching her play minecraft while i rub my dil'

watching her twitch stream while i apply my itch cream

my favorite type of popsicles is the orange dreams

speaking of dream

i just creamed

'cause i just got an itch on my bean

bean

i call this one the eminem

mhm

a wam bam

bamble-wa-dam-dam

a wam fam

bom

bom

bamble-la-dam

da-dam jam

in my booty hole

bam bamel-lam mam

mommy mommy

ma' ma' ma-bam-bam

bam bam 'le bam bam

dam dam

stan stan

bam bam

bang

ting tang

hoo kang

hoo la da bing bang

bam bam te zan dan

banana ban

banana boat

banana boat

banana bed

banana boat

banana bread

bam bam te'le dan dam

ram dam dam te'le dam

dam dam

go to the dam dam

rem down

to bo da di

tim ta doom doom

a ba da di

bam dam

orange