even shadows have shadows
Singer:eyedea
burned every bridge over the troubled water
no longer hiding from my personality disorder
a stronger tide is coming
trying to function fine without my mind
climbing out this fucking corner
i was born a thorn away from the rotten petals
wrapped in the absence of heaven's heavy hands
to develop an evident level of benevolence
so it's probably better i sold my soul to the devil
this is a message to anyone i've met that thinks they know me
don't pretend to understand
none of the issues that i'm holding
i was in a rush to grow up
just a stomach in disgust
and the fearthat i might go nuts
one day this shit'll kill me
i've lost all faith in a world so full of hate
and i don't fucking love music
i'm caught between wanting to punch someone in the face
and putting a bullet in my head to leave the human race
everything takes its toll
but there's no tolls i can take
i haven't yet found a good reason to be awake
introducing the corroded bones i hide behind my smile
i'm angry at the universe for the way she treats me now
i'm feeling like my enemy
not dealing with my tendencies
i peel the skin and then i squeeze
the real imprinted hansen's disease
not healing in this century
i'm kneeling to the entity
who built this penitentiary's as filthy as a centipede
was willing to just let me bleed while i wore a game face
i'll be in the same place
this planet's just an overpopulated mental hospital
each zombie walking round constitutes another obstacle
i'm finally coming out my shell
all 19 years of my life have been in conflict with myself
i'm insecure about every facet of my existence
from my addictions to the condition i choose to live in
who you kiddin'? i suffer from excess anxiety
a product of pollution in american society
stare into my eyes and see the hell that burns inside my mind
and i no longer have an ego i can hide behind
but i've been fine disregarding my insanity
every form of art isolates you from humanity
but it's provoked against being force fed
so fuck education for a decade and three years
of headaches from my peers
'cause now i realize i could have learned more on my own
they taught me how to know everything except my soul
which is everything i need to grow
everything that keeps me whole
everything that ever meant anything to eyedea
i leap with golden hope to rip the leash that holds my focus
but the fact remains the same
i'm still bound by chains
it doesn't matter if your chain is 10 feet or 100 feet
the fact remains the same
you're still bound by chains
some people say i've changed and it's harder to relate to me
good! i never liked you; our friendship was make-believe
i'm peeling the mask back and
revealing the rap that's been filling my organs
drilling short distorted portions
of morbid masochistic torture that unfortunately crafted
an interest to orbit my portrait
and inflict my image with disorder
feels like the brain is hanging on by one clothespin
i've hidden in the darkness for too long
but on the inside it's so wrong
but i don't know if it can
for a man or machine or whatever the fuck i am
burned every bridge over the troubled water
no longer hiding from my personality disorder
come and stay in madness's favorite little corner
'cause even shadows have shadows
and my secrets are eating me
eagerly feeding to scream my dreams away
but they keep on defeating me
welcome to the dusty subconscious of an actor
who murdered his childhood to stop the audience's laughter
how am i to break free from my fears
when i don't like what i see and i can't feel what i hear?
so don't judge my book by its cover
'cause my story's just as fucked up as any other