it was supposed to be so easy

it was supposed to be so easy

just take back the dvd

withdraw that extra money

tell mum i wouldn't be back for tea

then grab my savings and hurry

so first to get the film back in time

to avoid that big fine

i had to do a fast hill climb

but a faster decline

but i flew a bit quick

arms like a lunatic

had to stop for a few ticks

i started feeling sick

got to the video shop in a state

but chuffed it wouldn't be late

only when he flicked open the case

i'd left the disc at my place

today i've achieved absolutely nought

in just being out of the house

i've lost out

if i wanted to end up with more now

i should've just stayed in bed

like i know how

so i failed on the dvd

but i still had to get the money

tell mum i couldn't make tea

get the saving and then hurry

rushing to the cash machine

still a bit mashed and lean

then of course a mandatory car

drives by and splashes me

get there the queue's outrageous

ladies taking ages

my rage is blowing gauges

how longs it take to validate your wages?

at last my turn comes

press the 50 squid button

insufficient funds

today i've achieved absolutely nought

in just being out of the house

i've lost out

if i wanted to end up with more now

i should've just stayed in bed

like i know how

so i failed on the dvd

couldn't withdraw any money

but i still had to call mum

get the savings and hurry

so to call mum so that

i could tell her i cant go and that

at least i remembered my phone man

i didn't know her number offhand

where's my phone have i got it

oh this is a crock of shit

i lost the fucking thing

oh here it is in my pocket

but the batteries nearly flat

gotta call quick snap

aww shit

the battery is flat

today i've achieved absolutely nought

in just being out of the house

i've lost out

if i wanted to end up with more now

i should've just stayed in bed

like i know how

so ive failed on the dvd

couldnt withdraw any money

or call mum about tea

i'll have to get the savings and hurry

but where was the money

i knew i'd left it on the

side

next to the telly

this is not even funny

i left it in the living room

ready to pick up as soon

as i passed through

on the way out to the rendevous

so the shoebox full of money

just disappearing from me

is not what i call funny

a grand dont come for free

today i've achieved absolutely nought

in just being out of the house

i've lost out

if i wanted to end up with more now

i should've just stayed in bed

like i know how

(oi

soaked to the bone in my jeans

do you want me to stop?

i imagine my mums weaping right now

and the thousand pounds you swore

that i left on the table this morn

has simply disappeared before my eyes

his eyes and yours

and i'm a thousand pounds poorer

a hundred thousand pennies

no more

a thousandth of a million quid

or two monkeys or a whole fifty scores

gone withdrawn from my life

the money is no more for sure)

it was supposed to be so easy