meet the crew (remastered)

i got your head spinnin' runnin' circles around you

with a baseball bat that i'm using to pound you

i'll be up in your face in the blink of an eye

no

i don't have wings

but i don't need them to fly

with a couple double jumps

i'll be fleeing the zone

pick up your intel quick

then i'm bringing it home

i'm a pretty big deal

that's the honest truth

i mean

do you even know who you're talking to?

about face

maggots

stand at attention

learn from a soldier who's reached perfection

forward charge with my rpg

helmet so low

i can hardly see!

bam - rocket jumping all over the place

finish you punks with a shovel to the face

if that don't kill you

it'll break your nose

i hope you weasels are taking notes

welcome to my magical candy land

where smiles are from ear to ear

and everyone loves each other

come and spread the cheer

this rap is kind of overdue

but now it's time to meet the crew

the crazy dudes of tf2

so pick a side

red or blue?

after i pick my class

i'm gonna kick your ass

cuz that's what we were born to do

let's set up shop and get to work

i built a health dispenser if you've been hurt

plus i got plenty of sentry defenses

but do not touch

cuz this stuff's expensive

auto-aim rockets oughtta wreck you bumpkins

and just in case i need it - self destruction

step back 'fore i whack you with a wrench

and when my turrets spot you

you're as good as dead

cry some more

run while you can

you little babies don't stand a chance

they call me heavy

this is my gun

when she starts spinning

you'd better run

i do not require brains or technique

i've got so much muscle

i'll never be beat

i'll mow you down wherever you stand

bitch!

now i am hungry

make me sandvich

ok

i'm good

are you a bleeding idiot?

to fight with a drunken scot?

i'll down a swig of whiskey

for every grenade i launch

wherever i go

the explosions follow

so keep your distance

lad

and i carry traditional weapons

i'll bloody you up with an axe

this rap is kind of overdue

but now it's time to meet the crew

the crazy dudes of tf2

so pick a side

red or blue?

pick out my favorite class

check out my fancy hats

i just don't know which one to choose

i'm ze medic

zo don't go far

you might vant a tazte of my ubercharge

still a doctor

but i lost my license

zis could be a problem - shiza!

i'm alvays ready vith a bloody bone saw

but i can't help much if your head is blown off

die

schveinhund

i vill vin zis

don't overdose on my syringes!

boom! that's another headshot

bloke

i'm a professional

you're a joke

i mean please mate

show some respect

at least the way i'm doin' it

you'll get a quick death

i'm from the outback

where things get hectic

got a big machete that i'll slice your head with

aussie assassins aren't very common

but when you hear this

keep on runnin'

you probably know me for my disguise

and i dress as sharp as all my knives

just when you think i'm on your team

au revoir

mon cheri

i'm a very accomplished back stabber

who destroys your equipment with my sapper

gentlemen

there's a spy in our midst

and he's got plenty of ass to kick

this rap is kind of overdue

but now it's time to meet the crew

the crazy dudes of tf2

so pick a side

red or blue?

after i pick my class

i'm gonna kick your ass

cuz that's what we were born to do