mess of me

citizen soldier

(my charade

my charade

my grenade

my grenade

my charade

my charade

my grenade

my grenade)

stay on the inside

don't let your secret out

reveal the landslide

that's always pouring

down

down like the rain

can you see me drownin'?

drifting away

they'll never understand

why i disappear

the voices that i hear

calling me into the darkness

i'll breathe in

i'll breathe out

so sick of holding it down

when no one sees

this mess of me

it's okay

i'm alright

even though i'm dyin' inside

i'm never free

of this mess of me

i dance with demons

conceal this double life

no rhyme or reason

for the war behind these

eyes

don't get too close

do you see what i see?

haunting like a ghost

i'm never free

i'll breathe in

i'll breathe out

so sick of holding it down

when no one sees

this mess of me

it's okay

i'm alright

even though i'm dyin' inside

i'm never free

of this mess of me

this mess of me

no

i'm never free

my charade

my grenade

i will lie for you

i will follow you

until the end

i'm ashamed

i'm afraid

if they knew the truth

of my abuse

what would they do?

what would they do?

my charade

my grenade

if they knew the truth

of my abuse

i'll breathe in

i'll breathe out

so sick of holding it down

when no one sees

this mess of me

it's okay

i'm alright

even though i'm dyin' inside

i'm never free

oh

of this mess of me

i'm never free

of this mess of me