routine pain

on any given day i'm a 6 of 10

bed to desk to bar - eyes on the floor

still apologizing for the way i've been

each breath more full of shit than the one before

yeah i know the negative consumes me

guess i'm alright

let the guilt pass right through me

while my friends are taking dives

off of cliffs and i just worry

about the songs i'll never write

it don't matter -

they don't want to hear me on the other side

so let me ruin my guts tonight

just let me ruin my guts tonight

on any given day it hurts to stand up straight

erasing the same message from my phone

reaching out to friends who probably think that i am dead

i should want to go home but i won't

these past four months i've been so angry

i'm not alright

can you please come look right through me

and try to give a reason why?

i don't know you or why you'd care

but the devil's loose inside

and i'm so sick of saying sorry when i cry

so let me ruin my guts tonight

just let me ruin my guts tonight

you can haunt me 'til the world ends

and we melt in the sunlight

just let me ruin my guts tonight

on any given day i'm out to break your heart

on any day you'll bleed me my self-worth

i'm done asking what's the point

of finishing the things we start

when we've got ten years with these bodies

and maybe twenty on this earth

but you said

we can't take another summer in this place