seaside lament (sand)

uno

dos

tres

quatro

cinco

cinco

seis

baby always wanted to spend the day at the beach

but i'd be just as happy if the seaside were well out of reach

sure

i like the sun and the little beach town

and i'm a good enough swimmer that i'll never drown

and i always come back with a tan but wearin' a frown

but i don't like sand

(it's dirty and gritty

it's litter for kitty

i just can't escape it

i don't wanna shape it)

sand down my pants

but i don't like sand

(hop in the shower

scrub for an hour)

sand down my pants

my baby complained that we never went to the shore

she finally convinced me to go

but i won't anymore

i stayed in the car and watched a portable t.v

but my baby got mad and ran on down to the sea

she came back with a bucket and a shovel and she came after me

and she put sand

(back from the surf route

to pester my swimsuit

a million pit vipers

in my ocean diapers)

sand down my pants

my baby put sand

(you know in my pants are

a portable sand bar)

sand down my pants

ooh

it's gritty in surf city

i just can't shake it until i'm naked

you know it makes my speedo's crunch like doritos

i got shifting dunes in my fruit of the looms

my baby put sand

(hop in the shower

scrub for an hour)

sand down my

little surfer girl went and found someone new

the lesson is learned; don't let it happen to you

but when i get lonely for her

there's something i do

i just put sand

(though i could kissed her

whenever i miss her

the sand is my friend now

all's well in the end now)

sand down my pants

i just put sand

(big heaping handfuls

remember it's granules)

sand down my pants