the smartphone hour (rich set a fire)

o-m-g chlo

answer me

woah

wait until i tell you what i heard!

it's too fucked to type

this shit is ripe

call back

i'll yell you every word

jenna roland calling

ugh

jenna roland calling. jenna roland calling. hey!

ohmygod. ohmygod. okay

so!

at the end of last night's party

very end of last night's party

did you see rich?

oh i saw rich

so he's behaving hazy like a tweaking junkie

flailing crazy like a freaking monkey

he's gotta learn to handle his high

shouldn't drink so much for a small guy

right

but

he wasn't drunk

the hell you say

jenna?

yo

he wasn't drunk!

the hell you say

jenna?

no! because i heard from dustin kropp

that rich had barely touched a drop

which means that you can't blame the things he did on alcohol

it's just so terrible

i don't want to relive it all

but do you want me to tell you?

spit it out! spit it out!

you really want me to tell you?

spit it out! spit it out!

i'll tell you 'cause you are my closest friend!

no i'm not?

yeah

i know

but here's what happened at the party's end

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

i thought i was dreaming

everybody was screaming!

when rich set a fire and he burned down the house

when rich set a fire and he burned down the house

o-m-g brooke

answer me

look

wait until i tell you what i saw!

ignore!

hmph! and also space and frowny face

i'm sorry that jeremy made out with me at the party

but it was totally his fault

and let's not let boys ever come between us ever again okay?

smiley face

lipstick

kitty paw

hey

we cool?

we are

okay

so!

at the end of last night's party

did you see rich?

no

i was crying

so he's behaving weird and i was frightened

'cause i feared his state was heightened

he's gotta learn to not really smoke a lot

he shouldn't get so high for a tiny guy

he's gotta learn to not really smoke a lot

he shouldn't get so high for a tiny guy

right

but

he wasn't high!

so you can't blame the things he did on pot

it's just so awful

so i'll talk about it a lot

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

i thought i was dreaming

everybody was screaming!

when rich set a fire and he burned down the house

when rich set a fire and he burned down the house

hey

everybody! have you heard?

rich set a fire

now go send the word!

]

sending a text

sending a tweet

sending a text

]

tweet

release the information

step

and repeat!

]

i'll spread the word!

that rich is flecked

no

i meant fucked

did i say 'flecked'?

sorry guys

that's just my auto-correct

r-i-c-h

can't you see?

just how much i care about your tragedy

change my profile pic to you

now i full understand what you're going through

r-i-c-h

it's a drag

i read

she read

they read you're in a body bag

r-i-c-h

can't you see?

just how much i love your tragedy

hi! hi! hi! hi!

yo! yo! yo! yo!

sup! sup! sup! sup!

fire!

hey!

talk it

text it

pass it

talk it!

woaaaaah. ready? okay

here we go!

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

it was so terribly gory

i got the whole bloody story

yeah

i wasn't quite there

but i know what happened i swear!

when rich set a fire and he burned the house down

when rich set a fire and he levelled the town

when rich set a fire and he fled to bombay

when rich set a fire 'cause he knew he was gay

when rich set a fire and he melted his head

when rich set a fire and he's totally dead

when rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

burned it down!

yeah

yeah

yeah!

did ya hear? did ya hear?

burned it down!

did ya hear? did ya hear?

yeah! yeah! yeah!

burned it down!

did ya hear? did ya hear?

that rich set a fire and he burned down the. rich set a fire and he burned down the. rich set a fire and he burned down the house

he told me cause he's my best friend!

rich set a fire and he burned down the house!

send!

end!