white dude

and y'ain't even want it with da boy

cause the way i'm livin life

is a muthafuckin joy

on some grown man b.i. i could have been a girl

or any ethnicity up in the world

but i'm rollin with the top back

i ain't gotta worry where the cops at

i ain't gotta wear a fucking bra strap

me and the crew

are really doing everything that we like to

man it's a damn good day to be a white dude

shit

i'm living good up in this bitch

dicky rollin round the city

blowin good up in that wip

i ain't black or dominican

not hispanic or indian

so imprisonment is not a predicament

i envision

for a white boy

hollatcha muthafuckin kike

boy

higher than a muthafuckin kite

it's iight boi

they ain't suspicious of jews

i'll show contrition it's cool

slap on the wrist

get ma daddy to choose

one of them top lawyers dat be rollin round in his crew

i'm eating chop soy and bowlin on a carnival cruise

das what i do kid

happy that my name ain't stupid

dave coulda been daquan with a few kids

but now i'm farting

overeating at meals

if ain't i gotta theme party

ion't be at goodwill

i'm dentist paying

tennis playing

smellin on some cabernet

and i ain't gay but if i was

everything would be okay

look. i know i'm being condescending in ma rhymes

but ma premium channels mean tyler perry's never live

getting tickets

they sick

i sit at the eagle 45

where i'm eating when i'm high's where they eat at to survive

yeah. it's little di in this bitch ho

happy that i'm white

but relieved i ain't a chick yo

i never wake up and have to cake on ma make up

or straighten hair

i ain't given a damn

i'm wearing whatever i wanna in this muthafucka

they up in heels

and tummy tuckin

theyon't grub except for takin them pills

foreal. and ion't bleach shit

ion't gotta eat dick

i ain't bleeding up out ma penis

smoking the weed

ion't fall asleep because i'm cheefing

in disagreements

i participate without weeping

and when i'm freaking

i'm getting daps

high fives

and all that

ma rep goin up

and at best

ho a slut

so what up

ya boy cut up

but eat butter

and i ain't gotta speak to ma mother. to still love her

and i been getting better looking with age

but a guy can get who he deserves with a horrible face

seal interlude

i go on dates

and never have to worry bout getting raped

and i watch a game and never have to worry bout how it's played

and i meet a babe and never have to act deliriously fake

and if impregnate i can pack a back and be on my way

but good luck girl!

yeah. i'm happy as fuck man

first off i'm a dude so

there was a one in two chance of that sucking

but now i can run a seven minute mile

i can defend my self adequately

i can be logical

i can get along with my room-mates

watch serious movies without being scared by them

and the on top of that i'm white

which is like

amazing because

everybody naturally assumes i'm a great person

i get a fair shot at the life i deserve

i mean i could underachieve my way into any college in the country

i get my hair cut at a salon

people hold the door open for me which is nice

er

i never have to get into a fight

like

for social purposes

and please don't take this as me just disparaging black people

it ain't about that

it's about me being happy that i'm white

know what i'm saying?

but on that note

could someone explain to me why fat joe

and any other person of hispanic descent

is allowed to say the n-word

i mean i guess it's unrelated but like that shit don't make any sense

i've been thinking about that shit a lot

because like if i could say the n-word

it would really help my rhyme scheme out

it's like the perfect filler word