wish i could drink

Singer:hayes, walker

wish i could drink

uh

wish i could drink

uh

wish i could drink

uh

uh

looking at my knuckles

so white

holding onto my hotel bed so tight

'cause i know if i let go i'ma follow the sound

of that piano outta my room and down to the lounge

where i'ma mess it all up

it's been four years since i've reeked of alcohol

but

i've been to the gym three times today

keep calling my wife with nothing to say

all of my trash cans are filled with coffee cups

but i still

wish i could drink

uh

wish i could drink

uh

lord knows

i can like a fish

y'all

i ain't just alcoholic

i'm staring at that water bottle

wonderin' if folks would notice

if i put a little vodka in it

maybe rehab ain't just a guest house

maybe i don't ever really check out

just appreciate the freedom

from my demons when they hush

and fight the temptation

when i just wish i could drink

uh

wish i could drink

wish i could have a beer with my sons

when they turn twenty one

but nah

i'ma be holding up a water

saying cheers with 'em

tryna smile back the time-flies tears with 'em

praying to anyone who will listen upstairs

they learn from my mistakes and not theirs

maybe it's in their blood

i hope it isn't

maybe they won't start 'cause they watched me quitting

maybe they've forgotten

maybe i'm forgiven

i wish i could forgive me

i wish i didn't

wish i could drink

uh

wish i could drink

uh

lord knows

i can like a fish

y'all

i ain't just alcoholic

i'm staring at that water bottle

wonderin' if folks would notice

if i put a little vodka in it

maybe rehab ain't just a guest house

maybe i don't ever really check out

just appreciate the freedom

from my demons when they hush

and fight the temptation

when i just wish i could drink

there's this nightmare i keep having

it's the worst joke i can imagine

someone slips a little jack in my coke behind my back

when i take a sip and taste it

i cannot believe i just wasted

all that struggle fighting from it

and i feel sick at my stomach

'cause the thought of starting all over

makes me want to get the opposite of sober so bad

and i'm so mad

i could kill whoever did it

and i wake up swinging

but all i hit is air

and i realize i was just dreaming

and i take a deep breath

and i thank god there's not a drop of jack on it

and i think

hey

maybe there is such thing as a good bad dream

'cause at that moment i don't wish i could drink